We have an artist!

The Netherlands has announced that they will be represented at Eurovision 2016 by Douwe Bob! Here are a couple songs of his to get you familiar with him:

“Pass It On”

“Stone in a River”

I can’t say I’m super thrilled. One of my least favorite genres of music is the set of fratty white guys with acoustic guitars (term copyright of Todd in the Shadows) singing pseudo-deep, almost sleazy platitudes about love or life designed to seduce the listener. I’ve spent a good portion of the evening familiarizing myself with Douwe Bob’s catalogue, and, regrettably, he fits exactly into this description. To be fair, his almost bluegrass “Multi Colored Angels” does show a tad bit of promise; if he goes in that direction and stays away from the faux-poetry, words could be eaten.

The Netherlands never do super well in my personal rankings; their song last year, “Walk Along,” came close before it was ruined by shoddy staging, non-comittal dramatic choices, and an uninvested performance, but before that, you have to go back to 2007 to find the last Dutch entry I loved. This probably won’t be any different, but he might whip up something to surprise me; who knows? The song is slated to be released in February, so we’ll wait until then to see what Mr. Bob creates.

And by the way, oh dear Dutch broadcaster, if you’re reading this, Dotan.

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